survival of the fittest

Day 4 of my series on sports. I would say it's the last day, but I haven't decided what to write about tomorrow, so I'll hedge my bets by saying day 4. And to my absolute favorite sport- baseball.

The major (and sometimes only) issue in baseball right now is the use of performance-enhancing drugs (PEDs). These used to be called steroids before some of them were human growth hormone and apparently, Manny Ramirez uses birth control (maybe that one where you only have 4 periods a year?). I've thought about it a lot (remember that I like thinking because it doesn't usually involve sweating), and it's honestly been a struggle for me to decide one way or another. Let's take a look-see...

I've always been inclined to allow people to engage in self-destruction if that is their desire. Prostitution, drug use, and other generally victimless crimes seem like a waste of resources for the police and government to chase after. So if you want to get backne and breasts and completely eliminate your ability to procreate, so be it. I couldn't care less. There are mitigating circumstances- for example, some consider that "roid rage" may lead to violent acts (like, say, murdering your ex-wife and a waiter). The severe mood effects of using PEDs and then again when you quit them- it's a factor to consider. But this post isn't about crime or violence; it's about sports.

Does it send a bad message to children? Sure does. So does getting caught cheating on your wife, or betting on games, or drunk driving, or beating people up, or using recreational drugs. The mindset that athletes should serve as role models to children is letting parents off too easily. Athletes can be someone to look to. So can parents. But also teachers. Pastors. Comedians. Small-business owners. Actors. Janitors. Gardeners. People who make an example out of their life by how they do things and not just what they do. Therefore, I'm not really buying that argument either.

I suppose the argument that PEDs are just a natural progression of what sports will become is valid enough. Technology changes everything- business, relationships, arts- sports is no exception. When they developed the first-down magic TV line, nobody complained that it was disturbing the integrity of the sport. People have clamored for instant-replay in baseball. Picking and choosing doesn't usually work, especially when it comes to something with such a democratic nature as technology- one of the goals of technology is to widen its accessibility. For every internet security screen, the hackers are already poking holes. As soon as a drug is pulled from the shelf, the labs are ready with another to replace it. Once they find a way to test for steroids, HGH shows up. Technology can't even keep up with itself. Since these drugs are available, use them. Run faster, throw harder, hit further. Everyone is doing it, so why don't you? While my tendency is toward Luddism, I can't argue with the fact that the world is changing, and it's not always for the worse. Maybe we'll see a time when Tom Brady would have been carted off the field, shot up with some horse testosterone, undergo a quick surgery with some lasers, and he's back out at the top of the second half.

But after all of this pontification, I'm still nagged by the fact that there are just too many players. Too many teams. The lure of money and fame make the decision to shoot up very easy, so that average players can become great players and great players can become phenomenal. The leagues accommodate- there are now 30 Major League Baseball teams- each with at least 3 farm teams apiece. There are semi-pro teams, and alternative pro leagues. There's enough baseball to fill up 6 or 8 channels of MLB Ticket. You used to have to be really good to get in the bigs. You had to be really good to get into the Hall of Fame. Now it's like the Walk of Fame in Hollywood- stick around for more than 4 years, and get your ticket punched. The fact that one played for x number of years does not qualify them for the Hall of Fame. It does seem like kissing baseball writer ass would help though. When the players are buying their talent at the doctor's office, it's hard to give them credit for their plays. The bad message they are sending to kids isn't so much, "hey, it's okay to take drugs." It's "hey, anyone can play pro sports." Ergo, anyone can make a lot of money running a hedge fund. Anyone can have sex with whomever they want, regardless of whether that person consents. You can eat your cake and have it too. Working hard is for losers. Even when you get caught, you can just make puppy dog eyes, apologize a dozen times, and do an interview with Barbara Walters or Matt Lauer or anyone on 60 Minutes. Then you promise to do better while you collect your paycheck and research a more discreet drug.

In the end, I'm anti-PED. Because I'm anti-bullshit.